First, they came for the haircuts:
A young San Antonio Spurs fan faces an in-school suspension on Thursday if he doesn’t somehow find a way to alter the image of Matt Bonner that was shaved into the back of his head….
Because the image is so threatening, and so severe, if the style isn’t “fixed” by Thursday, Gonzalez will have to take in an in-school suspension (the worst of all suspensions, because you don’t get to go home and watch TV), because that seems very rational and fair to all the children.
Then they came for the ice cream:
Looking to hit the spot with a savory ice cream at Great Brook Farm State Park this week?
You may be out of luck.
The park’s popular ice-cream stand was unexpectedly shut down by state officials over the weekend, after the stand’s operator made building improvements at the site without getting permission first.
Mark Duffy, who has operated the dairy farm at the state-owned park for 26 years and has a lease with the state to run the stand, said armed Environmental Police officers showed up at stand on Friday evening and stood guard throughout the weekend, turning away customers craving delectable sundaes and frappes…
The building improvements in question were made to create an area to show an instructional video produced by the Massachusetts dairy industry, said Duffy.
And in at least one town, they’re still refusing to let one family take action to keep irresponsible motorists from repeatedly crashing into their house:
A Pennsylvania couple has found themselves in an all-too-familiar situation this week when a car crashed into their home for the fourth time, the third time in the past six months…The couple has wanted to put a boulder in front of their house to prevent accidents from damaging their home, but they said they have been told that such an obstacle would make them liable for any damage to a rogue driver.“This is a 30 miles per hour zone. We do live on a curve and our house is close to the road, but, recently, the township put in a two-lane bridge directly across from my house,” she said. “If you come across that bridge and you don’t stop, you’re in my house.”“The thing that’s frustrating is that I was told by a few of the rescue workers that my car, which was parked there and is totaled, is what saved [the driver’s] life,” she said, adding that a boulder would have saved him without wrecking her car.
Wouldn’t it be great to live in a country where your hairstyle isn’t a matter for the Spanish Inquisition, or where you could make property improvements–particularly defensive ones–without asking “mother may I” of an army of bureaucrats? What would you call such a country?